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Hoe  schrijf  ik  een  topartikel?

workshop 1CWZ Nijmegen

Annemarie van der Zeeuw

www.focusoptekst.nl/graduate-school

Programma

• De  kenmerken  van  een  wetenschappelijke  stijl• De  fasen  in  het  schrijfproces• IMRaD• Opzet  van  Inleiding  en  Discussie• (Figuren  en  tabellen)• De  basis  van  tekstopbouw:  topic  and  key  sentences• De  tijden  van  het  werkwoord

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De  kenmerken  van  een  wetenschappelijke  stijl

YOUR  SENSE  OF  STYLE

1. Are  metaphors  appropriate  in  scientific  texts?

2. What  feature  of  scientific  writing  do  you  consider  the  most  important?

3. How  important  are  style  conventions  in  scientific  writing?

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HET  SCHRIJFPROCES

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Writing

What  do  writers  do?

Select topics – select content – select questions to answer – find key messages – articulate the point of each paragraph – be clear about aims –add enough meta text – but not too much -gather information – search for more evidence - make a sketch or outline – try to be a fresh reader – formulate key messages – resume or paraphrase ideas of other people – check grammar, spelling, punctuation – hedge conclusions – try to say it in less words or to build shorter sentences - ……. - ……… -­‐………

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The  simple writing process

Edit,  revise,  edit…

Write

Plan

Stages  of  the  writing  process

Edit

Write  – find words

Organize

Select  

Plan

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Stages  of  the  writing  process

Edit

Write

Organize

Select  

Plan CONTENT

FORM

Simon  Peyton  Jones,  Cambridge‘How  to  write  a  great  research  paper’(You  Tube)

The  first  ofSEVEN  SIMPLE  SUGGESTIONS1. Write  early:  writing  =  researching

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The  writing  process  according  to  Jones

Edit

Rewrite

Analyze

WRITECONTENT    

FORM

Split  the  writing and  the  thinkingBUT  ALSO  Write  to clarify and  develop yourthoughts

• Writing    =  planning  +  selecting  +  structuring  +  finding  words +  viewing  your  text  through  the  eyes  of  the  reader  +  revising

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So,  what  helps?

• Work  in  stages  • Save  the  grammar/spelling/punctuation  for  last  • Be  flexible  – switch  between  stages• Talk  about  your  paper  with  others• Ask  for  (structured)  feedback  in  an  early  stage

IMRAD

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The  format:  IMRDIntroductionWhat is  the  subject  of  this study?  Why  is  it  important?  What do  we  already know?  Whatdo  we  not know yet?  So,  what is  the  problem or  reason for this particular study?  And:  what is  the  major  question  of  this study?Materials and methodsWhat was  tested or  investigated?  And how did we  do  it?  Under  what conditions?  ResultsWhat did we  find?  DiscussionWhat are  the  major  findings?  How  can  we  interpret and explain them?  What can we  derive from them?  How  do  the  findings meet  or  not meet  our expectations?  What are  comparisons with previous studies?  What are  possible criticisms?  What are  the  strengthsand weaknesses of  this study?  How  should we  carry on?  ConclusionsWhat is  the  answer to the  major  question?  What does  the  answer implicate?

4  sections,  4  purposes

Introduction

motivate  your  reader,  background,  importance,  your  idea  

and  aim  of  your  research

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4  sections,  4  purposes

Materials  and  Methods

make  replication  of  results  possible  +  soundness  of  argument

4  sections,  4  purposes

Results

outline  relevant  findings,  give  a  picture

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4  sections,  4  purposes

Discussion

reflect  on  results,  give  meanings  to  your  findings,  

support  conclusions,  eye  for  the  future  

THE  INTRODUCTION

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Question  Tool  Introduction

• What is  the topic  of  this paper?• What is  the problem?• Why is  it important?• What do  we  (not)  know yet?• How  will I  search  for the answer?

! !The$Introduction$!

1.!What!is!the!topic!of!the!study?!!!!!!!

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$2.!What!is!the!problem?!!!!!!!

$3.!Why!is!it!important?!!!!!!

$4.!What!do!we!(not)!know?!Gap!of!knowledge?!!!!!!

!5.!How!to!find!the!answer?!!!!!!!

!!!!!

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Story  line  of  the  introductionTOPIC /  MOVE QUESTIONS

ESTABLISHING TERRITORY What is  the  topic?  

ESTABLISHING A  GAP  

What is  the  problem?

Why important?

What do  we  know/what not?    Gap  of  knowledge?

FILLLING THE  GAP What research  question?

Design  or  methodology?  How  to find the  answer?

Happiness is  infectious• Nicholas  Christakis (Harvard Medical School)  &  James  Fowler (University  of  California)• Data  from the  Framingham Heart Study (ongoingcardiovascular study,  begun in  1948)  • Study looked at  5,000  individuals over  20  years

• Happiness spreads  like an emotional contagion• When you get  happy,  the  network effect  can bemeasured up  to 3  degrees• This chain  reaction benefits  friends’  friends,  and yourfriends’  friends’  friends…• Conversely,  sadness does  not spread  J

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funnel shape of  introduction

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3  moves  of  SwalesMove  1  Establishing a  territoryClaiming centrality – Making  topic  generalisations –Reviewing items  of  previous reserachMove  2  Establishing the  gapCounter-­‐claiming – Indicating a  gap  – Raising a  question  –Continuing a  traditionMove  3    Filling the  gapOutlining purposes – Announcing present  research  –Announcing main findings – Indicating article structure

THE  DISCUSSION

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Discussion Happiness

• Find the  questions that are  answered in  the  discussion section of  the  Happiness article

Happiness  Discussionan  outline  in  questions

1. What  is  the  answer  to  the  main  question?  -­‐>  What  does  this  show?  -­‐>  How  remarkable  is  this?

2. How  do  the  results  compare  with  earlier  studies?  (answer:  in  line  with  evolutionary  theories)-­‐>  how  does  spreading  of  happiness  serve  an  evolutionary  purpose?

3. How  can  we  explain  these  findings?  -­‐>  various  possible  mechanisms  (1,2,3)

4. What  is  a  surprising  finding?  What  can  we  learn  from  that  /  what  can  it  mean?

5. So  what?  Relevance?  -­‐>  example  (illness)

6. What  is  the  general  conclusion?  Take  home  message?

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The  discussionTOPIC QUESTION

Bottom  line  main  result(s)  message  implication

What  is  an  important  finding?  How  do  the  data  support  the  finding?  Or:  what  is  our  claim?

Comparison  with  earlier  studies,  what  is  different,  what  is  new?

How  does  this  finding  relate  to  what  we  already  know?  Is  it  affirmative?  How?  Or  how  not?  And  what  does  that  mean?

Explanation,  interpretation  and  mechanisms.:

How  can  we  explain  this  finding?  (If  – partly  – unexpected)  What  is  solved,  what  is  still  unclear?

Weakness/strengths  design/methods  statistical  power

What  are  limitations  /  strengths  of  the  study,  and  how  do  they  support  or  weaken  our  claim?    

Clinical  interpretation  and  medical  relevance

What  are  implications?  What  can  we  derive  from  this  finding?    Who  benefits?

Conclusion  with  implication,  suggestions

What  is  the  general  conclusion?    How  can  we  go  on  from  here?  Suggestions  for  further  research.

PARAGRAPH  STRUCTURE:  TOPIC  AND  KEY  SENTENCE

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the  topic  sentence

Science  has  shown  an  impressive  growth  over  past  decades  and  more  scientific  papers  are  published  now  than  ever  before.  Between  1996  and  2011,  over  15  million  individuals  authored  around  25  million  papers.  Owing  to  expanding  research  fields,  it  is  increasingly  difficult  to  getstudies  published  in  high  impact  journals.  This  is  important  since..........  Consequently,  in  order  to  get  published,  scientific  discoveries  can  sometimes  be  exaggerated  or  the  potential  implications  overstated.    Indeed,  overinterpretation,  overstatement,  and  misreporting  of  scientific  results  have  been  frequently  reported.  However,  the  prevalence  of  this  problem  in  the  scientific  literature  is  unclear.

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The  funnel

introduction  

details,  examples,  comparisons,  explanation,  

argumentation

point  (key  message)  

Treating  patients  for  a  complicated  Urinary  Tract  Infection  (cUTI)  with  an  oral  antibiotic  instead  of  an  intravenous  antibiotic  has  several  advantages.  Often,  the  administration  of  intravenous  antibiotics  provokes  specific  complications,  such  as  infection  of  the  iv-­‐catheter.  Also,  it  implies  hospitalization  or  a  specialized  home  treatment,  of  which  complications  like  hospital  acquired  infection,  functional  decline,  venous  thrombo-­‐embolism,  falls,  delirium,  sleep  deprivation,  pressure  ulcers  and  readmissions    are  well  known.  These  risks  are  avoided  by  the  use  of  oral  antibiotics.  

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Book case

First sentence announces content  

First  element  /  step  /  feature /  idea

Second  element /  step  /  feature  /  idea

Third element  /  step  /  feature  /  idea

Pulmonary  nerve  endings  were  relatively  insensitive  to  phenal  diguanide.  Of  25  pulmonary  nerve  endings  tested,  only  10  were  stimulated  when  this  drug  was  injected  into  the  right  atrium,  and  in  only  one  of  these  did  firing  exceed  2.2.  impulses/s.    If  the  latter  ending  is  excluded,  the  average  peak  frequency  of  the  endings  stimulated  was  only  1.7  impulses/s.  

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The  pyramid

point(key  message)

explanation,  argumentation

data,  details,  further  background  

Few  studies  have  examined  residential  exposures  to  agricultural  pesticides  and  the  results  from  these  studies  have  been  mixed.  Two  studies  examined  pesticide  use  in  California  using  the  California  Pesticide  Use  Reporting  database  and  childhood  cancer  incidence  rates  at  the  census  block  group  level.  These  investigators  found  no  associations  between  agricultural  pesticides  (individual,  chemical  groups,  or  toxicologic  groups)  and  childhood  ALL  or  gliomas,  except  for  a  positive  significant  association  between  the  90th percentile  of  propargite,  a  pesticide  used  to  kill  mites,  and  leukemia.  In  a  case–control  study  of  childhood  leukemia  in  California,  Rull  et  al.  compared  the  density  of  applied  pesticides  within  half  a  mile  from  the  birth  residence  for  213  cases  and  268  controls  and  found  positive  associations  with  pesticides  categorized  into  chlorinated  phenols,  organophosphates,  and  triazines.  However,  these  findings  were  only  significant  at  the  middle  tertile  of  exposure  and  the  strength  of  association  weakened  as  exposure  increased.

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The  spread  of  happiness  seems  to  reach  up  to  three  degrees  of  separation,  just  like  the  spread  of  obesity  and  smoking  behaviour.  Hence,  although  the  person  to  person  effects  of  these  outcomes  tend  to  be  quite  strong,  they  decay  well  before  reaching  the  whole  network.  In  other  words,  the  reach  of  a  particular  behaviour  or  mood  cascade  is  not  limitless.  We  conjecture  that  this  phenomenon  is  generic.  We  might  yet  find  that  a  “three  degrees  of  influence  rule” applies  to  depression,  anxiety,  loneliness,  drinking,  eating,  exercise,  and  many  other  health  related  activities  and  emotional  states,  and  that  this  rule  restricts  the  effective  spread  of  health  phenomena  to  three  degrees  of  separation  away  from  the  ego.

The  first  sentence:  topic  sentence

The  first  sentence  of  a    paragraph:• introduces  the  topic  of  the  paragraph• may  signal  the  move  or  the  question that  the  paragraph    answers• sometimes:  provides  the  central  idea  (the  point  or  key  sentence)  

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VERB  TENSES

VERB  TENSES

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The  tenses

PRESENT SIMPLEOTT  

I  thinkThey find

PAST  SIMPLEOVT

I  thoughtThey found

PRESENT  PERFECTVTT

I  have thoughtThey have  found

PAST  PERFECTVVT

I  had  thoughtThey had  found

Present  tense:  They say

ü To present  general factsü To make  author-­‐specific citationsü To paraphrase informationü To give an opinionü To state  research  aims

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Past  simple:  We  analyzed

üTo refer to specific and  finished actions,  events  or  states in  the  past

In  your paper:  refer to your research  and  results in  Intro  +  Disc

üElsewhere in  your article:  often accompanied bya  past  time  marker:  in  early 2004,  two decades  ago,  yesterday..

Present  perfect  -­‐ We  have  shown

üTo refer to an unspecified time  beforenow,  and  actions,  events  or  states thatare  unfinished or  have  direct  relevanceto the  present.  In  your paper:  to refer to recent  research  and  trends  (Introduction):  direct  relevance to current state  or  knowledge

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In  the  IntroductionPRESENT  SIMPLE

To describe general background  in  the  beginning-­‐ The  physical process of  fragmentation is  relevant  to…

-­‐ Cancer  is the  main course  of  death in  …..

PRESENT  PERFECT  

To describe the  problem till now (currency):-­‐ Persistence has most  often been  studied in  terms of…

-­‐ Yet,  while several studies  have  evaluated whether healthierfoods or  diets  cost more,  the  evidence has never,  to ourknowledge,  been systematically reviewed

In  the  Introduction

PRESENT  SIMPLE  +  PAST  SIMPLE  for author-­‐specificcitations:

Past  simple:-­‐ Jones  et  al  (2006)  measured the components of….  (focus  on  research:  what did they DO)

Present  simple:-­‐ Huet (2014)  mentions the need to investigate (focus  on  reporting:  what do  they REPORT)

Here,  the past  simple is  also possible.

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In  the  Introduction

PRESENT  SIMPLE  +  PAST  SIMPLEAt  the  end  of  the  introduction:  -­‐ To address this deficiency,  we  sought to generatenormal and neoplastic pancreatic organoids bymodifying……..

-­‐ We  hypothesize(d)  that…-­‐ The  aim of  our study was…..  

In  the  MethodsPAST  SIMPLE  (your actions)Other info:  other tenses

Although complete  masking of  interventions was not possible,  patients provided written informed consent  to participate in  their own study group,  without  being informed of  the  existenceof  another group.  This form  of  masking is common  in  cluster  randomised trials,  and avoids potential bias  from patients in  the  control  group requesting the  intervention or  otherwise alteringtheir behaviour.  Oncologists and investigators  were aware of  assignment.

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In  the  ResultsPAST  SIMPLE  

Three  putative  GREs,  3  AREs  and  4  C/EBPβ  binding  sites  were predicted  on  pig  3β-­‐HSD  gene  promoter  (Fig. 3a).  ChIPassay  revealed significantly  lower  binding  of  GR  to  the  first  and  the  third  predicted  GREs  on  3β-­‐HSD  promoter  in  the  liver  of  EHL  piglets  (P < 0.05,  Fig. 3b).  No  significant  breed  difference  was  observed  for  the  binding  of  AR  or  C/EBPβ  to  3β-­‐HSD  promoter  in  the  liver  of  preweaning piglets  (Fig 3c  en  d).

In  the  DiscussionMIX

Stating  the  answer  to  your  question:  PRESENT  SIMPLE

Our results show that in  patients with exacerbationsrequiring hospital admission,  a  5-­‐day  treatment  course  of  40  mg  of  prednisone daily is noninferior toa  14-­‐day  treatment  course  with respect  toreexacerbation.

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In  the  DiscussionMIX

Reflection  on  study:  PRESENT  SIMPLE

Looking  back:  PAST  SIMPLE

Our study has  several limitations.  When we  designedthis noninferiority trial,  there was no  standard  glucocorticoid regimen for the  treatment  of  exacerbated COPD.

Summary

• the  three  most  used  tenses:  present  simple,  past  simple,  present  perfect• look  back  at  your  research:  past  simple• reflect  on  your  research:  present  simple  (now)• work  of  others:  present  perfect  (still  important)

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LIJDENDE  VORM

The  passive:  whodunnit?

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Two  samples  were  assessed.  

Two  samples  were  assessed.  

Actor  is  not  important

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Two  samples  were  assessed.  

We  assessed  two  samples.

Actor  is  not  important

Actor  is  unknown,  unimportant  or  anyone

• The  subjects  were randomly assigned to one of  three conditions.

• The  therapeutical potential  of  fish  oil  was  discussed in  an  editorial  in  this  journal  last  year.

• Scientific  texts  must  be  spelled  correctly.

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We  assessed  two  samples.  

Passive  voice  is  leading  in  Methods  section

Actor  is  not  important

.............  but  not  automatically  in  the  other  sections  of  your  article

....  because  ......

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The  active  voice  is  more  precise

This method has  been  shown to be more  effective.

This method has  been  shown to be more  effective.

This method is  more  effective…

X  has  shown this method to  be  more  effective..

The  active  voice  is  more  precise

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The  active  voice  is  more  concise

• As  an  alternative  method,  a  multicopy  mean-­‐field  approach  can  also  be  used.

• A  multicopy  meanfield  approach  is an  alternative  (method).

The  active  voice  is  more  concise

• When  the  new  protocol  was  applied,  acceptable  or  better  solutions  were  obtained  for  each  case.  

• After  application of  the  new  protocol,  each    case  resulted in  acceptable  or  better  solutions.

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In  summary,  we provide,  to  the  best  of  our  knowledge,  the  first  evidence  for  experience-­‐dependent  changes  in  white  matter  microstructure.    

Active  voice:  to  underline  your  own  conclusions  and  considerations

Active  voice:  to emphasize a  decision

We constructed a  sampling  frame  and selection processto minimize selection biases and maximizegeneralizability of  the  accumulated evidence.

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•We investigated  the  antiplaque  and  surface-­‐active  properties  of  mouth  rinses  containing..….    Additionally  the  effect  of  daily  use  was  established..

•We obtained  informed  consent  from  48  adults  and  placed  them  into  either  a  training  group  (n  =  24)  or  an  untrained  control  group  (n  =  24).  ..    This  was  done  by….

Combining  the  two:  a  better  style

Use the  passive:

• .….  if the  actor  is  not  important

• …..  if describing general facts,  relations  or  associations

• ....    and to maintain cohesion..

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Our analysis  of  scientific abstracts  demonstrates thatpositive and—to a  lesser extent—negative words are  increasingly used over  the  past  four decades.  By contrast,  this increase was  absent  for neutral and  random  words.  The  increase in  positive words could not  be attributed togeneral language tendencies as  represented by the  millionsof  printed books searched through in  thisstudy.  Neither is  the  increase driven by one or  two words,  because all wordsshowed increased frequency patterns.  Even  though the  upward trend  in  positive word  use was  conserved in  high  impact  journals,  this trend  was  significantly lesspronounced (fig 1⇓).  This difference could be the  result of...

Use the  active:

• …..  to vary your style in  Methods and  Results

• .....  to  underline  reasons  or  goals

• ……  presenting  your own thoughts